Day 55 – No thanks I don’t smoke.

So the high has worn off. My productive month of March is over. I did write my scripts. I did book a flight for the end of April but I must admit the past week has been tough. I have dispensed with the self-congratulation and the euphoria and have moved into a dangerous over-eating phase – the kind that often stops people from quitting smoking in the first place! You see I thought that by joining a weight loss group I would be switching my addictions/obsessions for the beginning of the rocky road to a smoke-free life. What has happened is that I am becoming a yo-yo diet woman. Not a habit I want to encourage or cultivate. I have always hated diets but then again I have always had a big appetite and love food so why would I deny myself such pleasure? I do not want to continue in this vein, though. I follow the rules rigidly. Lose a few pounds and on weigh-in day I treat and cheat. Each weigh-in day the treat seems to be getting bigger. I also don’t like that if I do not follow the programme exactly and even if I do not have treats or fats etc. that I actually gain weight rather than just maintain which is what should be the case. I think I may have to quit the weight loss group and resume normal attitude to food. The bingeing on biscuits and jellies has just got to stop and I think quitting the group might have to be an option. Let’s see what the rest of April brings. On the positive side, I’m back swimming lots of lengths in the pool and my lungs feel great. So onwards and upwards.

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